Why Next Year’s Bulls Will Look Like the ’86 Celtics with a Bench Mob

Many NBA fans have a thing about comparing Hall-of-Fame players from the past to the star players of today. Some see it as sacrilege comparing the 1996 Bulls to the 2016 Golden State Warriors. Get over it. It’s just basketball.

Lightning won’t strike you if you have an opinion. Records are meant to be broken. Comparing games and players is part of the fun of being a fan of the game if you know your basketball enough.

So, let’s look at a hypothetical Bulls roster for next year: the Chicago Bulls thru the lens of the 1986 Boston Celtics.

Besides, the St. Patrick’s Day Bulls Uniforms are the best of the Bulls on-court personas, second only to the Chicago-cursive uniforms.

Bulls Starting Frontline

• Cristiano Felicio as Robert Parish
• Joakim Noah as Kevin McHale

These two bigs have to start together for next year’s Bulls.  Joakim Noah cannot overextend himself each game grabbing tons of rebounds only to tire his shoulders banging around and getting hurt the next game. Cristiano Felicio is young enough to play more minutes and help Noah clean up the boards, especially defensive rebounds and offensive putbacks. The extended minutes may also speed up his usability against All-Star bigs and prepare him for the post season.

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Felicio and Noah are two big men who will help the Bulls stay consistent over the long haul. On offense, Felicio is tops over Noah because he has a mid-range jumper which extends to three-point range and he can be a strong diver in the pick-and-roll. His offensive game works off facing the basket, while Noah’s game is point-center offense passing, put-backs and backdoor cutting. Both of them inside will keep opposing front courts overwhelmed, just like when Parish and McHale camped in the paint won most games for the Celtics on both offense and defense.

GarPax can prime this frontline to become stronger by drafting for the best player they can pick with the 14th pick or move up by trading picks and adding a player from the roster.

If the gods favor GarPax, they could get anyone from Dragan Bender with a lottery pick (via trade), or my pet pick Marquese Chriss, the 18 year-old jump-and-fly shot blocker from Washington. They could even go with a high-risk, high-reward project like Kentucky’s Skal Labissiere. If the Bulls clear out enough money by trading Butler away, they might be able to get anyone from Dwight Howard (who will want to win a ring with Orlando Magic-type roster of four shooters and plenty of help on defense) to role-playing reliable bigs like Al Horford. Hassan Whiteside might be too greedy after this season and cash in, but Paxson is allergic to headcases on the team.

But all things considered, next year’s Bulls frontline look formidable.

The Scoring Machine of Hoiball

• Nikola Mirotic as Bill Walton
• Doug McDermott as Larry Bird
• Derrick Rose as Dennis Johnson
• E’Twaun Moore as Danny Ainge

These guys are the new Bulls offense. Forget Pau Gasol‘s post-up game. Forget Jimmy Butler‘s All-Star stats. Expect both Mirotic and McDermott to take up the load of those two on scoring. When the Bulls shooters are on, Hoiball is a juggernaut. In desperate situations, Mirotic can will his game on and shoot (and make) at will. McDermott can load up on threes through the course of a game as a catch-and-shoot option or score them one-after-another if the team runs the offense thru him. The duo of Mirotic and McDermott can make it their personal goal to shoot six threes a-piece every game as part of Hoiberg’s myriad offensive sets. You know they can, too.

And what most doofus fans think is that all they can do can shoot. Both can actually play mismatches with post-ups, fadeaways, driving floaters, backdoor cuts or even the pick-and-roll.

Derrick Rose will still find lanes doing what he does best and will be devastating even when he plays carefully with less above the rim moments scoring inside. E’Twaun Moore will still get his unstoppable floaters and snipe from long range.

Overall, for next year’s Bulls, it is this group that Hoiberg should build around with role players on defense to make the machine hum.

The key to keeping these guys developing and consistent is to run plays thru them and avoid bringing on another veteran scorer whose game needs on-ball offense and takes away touches and open looks from these four players. In other words, build the team around your best scorers and allow the other players to get their production as part of the system, rather than forgoing the system in favor of babysitting All-Stars or max-salary black holes or some vet the Bulls trade for.

(Unless Kevin Durant wants to wear a St. Patrick’s Day Bulls uniform and can play within Hoiberg’s weave.)

The Bench Mob Hoiball Version

• Justin Holiday as Ron Harper/Ronnie Brewer
• Bobby Portis as Horace Grant/Kurt Thomas
• Tony Snell as Luol Deng

Imagine the Boston Celtics with an athletic Bench Mob and that might be the coolest NBA 2K fantasy lineup ever.

But seriously, Justin Holiday is good enough to start and still play as wing defender role or as a high-energy attacking guard. He shoots threes like his brother, Jrue. Bobby Portis should be carefully evaluated by Hoiberg for what role he wants out of this energizer beast. Keep him playing aggressive on the boards and running out after stops for rim attacks. Do the Bulls want him to bulk up and learn post-up defense or do they want him swarming opposing ball-carriers with Holiday and Tony Snell?  As for Snell, Butler, Gasol and even Taj Gibson had a habit of never kicking out to certain players on the team until February came around and the Bulls were desperate. Snell was basically playing empty minutes just like McDermott because.Jimmy got lazy on defense and greedy for the stat sheet. Too many starts with empty stats made Snell look like a bust but sports fans know better.

The biggest homework the Bulls front office will be doing this summer is scouring other teams and the draft pool for players to fill out the Bench Mob to seven players deep. They are the Bulls’ heart and soul and the team identity.

In a Hoiball version of the Bench Mob, outside shooting will be a vital skill even for defensive role players. Building via free agency or thru player trades will easily fill in the needs of this group of players. Energy players who can hold their own at team defense would help.

Though draft scouts say this year’s crop is weak, most of the players on the board may actually work as role player cogs than as the next Kawhi Leonard. Guards to back up Derrick Rose may be GarPax’s primary focus and the 14th pick will have a choice from among four good kids like Furkan Korkmaz and Dejounte Murray, to rotation-ready Demetrius Jackson and Melo Trimble; or a gut choice like Caris LeVert, who might be the next Shaun Livingston.

We all have out pet favorites for filling out roster spots, from Butler value-for-value replacements, to squeezing in an extra player if we add Taj Gibson to the package.  You can even discuss your choices in the spirit of a Celtics theme with a Bench Mob booster shot.

Next: The summer brings tough choices for the Bulls

For now, this is how the Bulls would look like if GarPax were looking at the team without the bad eggs.

I’m looking forward to knowing the new teammates they might put together to wear the St. Patrick’s Day green by June or sooner.